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Old People--Like Us

10/15/2015

 
                    When one of us does something by mistake or forgets an important fact, a friend of my age walks up, smiles and says:  “I love Old People.”  It is a very polite and warm way of saying:  “You dumb ass.”
                    As I have reconnected with high school era classmates and acquaintances, I realize many of them are now old people.  Strangely, only a very few look like they did in high school.  Out of these few they are equally divided between males and female.  The rest of us just look like hell. How did all this happen? Often when you attend reunions they give you badges with your high school picture on it.  People will argue with you that you are not that person.  As they say:  “Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened?”
                    This concept of becoming your grandfather (or grandmother) just creeps up on you.  In my mind, I am still thin(er) with blonde hair.  Yet when I see one of my classmates, I realize that both of us have become Civil War veterans.  It is really scary how this just happened.  You remember that as a child you thought nap time was punishment.  Now it feels like a vacation.
                    There are times when I just want to crawl in one of those big commercial dryers for ten minutes and come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller.  However, we have lots to look forward to with more years.  Some older friends of mine say “Getting Lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what you went there for in the first place.  They say they enjoy walking now because it is the only time they hear heavy breathing again.  I wonder however if all that exercise at our older age just means longer stays in a nursing home?
                    At least at your layout they will say:  “Don’t he look good?”  I was always amazed at that expression at the funeral home.  People actually would walk up to the casket of the recently departed and say that, as if that made it better than he looks door knob dead, doesn’t he?  Regardless of the age of my reader, the age thing will happen with the absolute certainty of taxes and cracks in your concrete driveway.  As the young people say currently:  “Whatever.”



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    Having written and published an allegedly humorous book while travelling to lawyers' meetings, Steve was counseled by his friends to keep his day job. This site allows him to do both.

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